JCC – Coping with Elderly Parent Issues [Support Thread]

[I did a couple of thread title searches and didn’t see a thread for this topic, but if there is already one, mods please merge this as needed.]

I do not know if anybody else right here is coping with growing older father or mother points, however as a few of you could know from latest posts I’ve made in different threads, my aged mom lately had a major well being challenge. She had a fall, needed to have emergency surgical procedure for her damage and was hospitalized for every week, after which was launched to a nursing house for what was speculated to be non permanent rehab.

Nevertheless, she then had a 2nd fall within the nursing house and whereas her authentic damage appears to be therapeutic, her total situation for the reason that 2nd fall has undoubtedly deteriorated, though the one damage they may confirm from that fall was a sprained hip. A number of years in the past, she was identified with “gentle cognitive impairment” however had been persevering with to dwell independently and doing pleased with that (with a good quantity of help on my half, notably as soon as the pandemic began) earlier than she fell in late January. Nevertheless, her cognitive state has undoubtedly declined considerably since all this occurred, notably for the reason that 2nd fall.

I do not dwell in her space and have been making an attempt to handle the state of affairs remotely within the midst of a job which retains me very busy (together with engaged on the weekends). I had already been planning to maneuver her to my space final summer time, however did not do it due to the pandemic (did not need her in a congregate setting as I used to be planning to maneuver her to a senior group of some type).

I can be transferring her to my space this summer time, however the whole lot with that plan is now extra difficult given her decline this spring. I am simply hoping she’s going to get better sufficient to have the ability to do assisted dwelling with “reminiscence care” quite than simply transferring to a nursing house as a long-term resident. For one factor, I’m now making an attempt to get Energy of Legal professional standing since her Medicare-pay standing could also be altering quickly and I’ll want entry to her funds to be able to pay for her care as soon as the Medicare protection ends.

Anyway, I have been having a tough time coping with all this emotionally and thought I would begin a assist thread in case there are ever any others round right here coping with these sorts of points (or others who’ve performed so up to now and ever need to share their expertise/perception/recommendation).

As anybody who has handled these sorts of conditions is aware of, there are such a lot of fraught points that sometimes arise–conflicts with siblings over deal with issues, long-standing household “baggage” within the parent-adult baby relationship(s), the disappointment of seeing a father or mother decline, guilt that comes with not with the ability to do as a lot as you suppose you “ought to” be capable to do, and naturally a bunch of logistical and sensible challenges.

Due to any who made it to the top of this opening put up! Hopefully this thread may be helpful to anybody coping with these points.